I had been preparing for my Saturn return for years. 

I didn’t want to experience the same alienation I saw firsthand in my (then) boyfriend and other close people. So, I prepared with devotion. 

I read about it in books and on the internet. I studied astrology to understand the mechanics of transits. I listened to podcasts about it. I interviewed people who had already experienced the Saturn return to gather insights and tips.  

Before it arrived in my life, I was already implementing some of the most common pieces of advice linked to this planet, like: 

• Saving
• Taking care of my health
• Organizing my time
• Thinking long-term
• Charging fair prices for my work
• Saying “no” more often
• Taking responsibility
• Keeping my word
• Stop procrastinating to avoid moments of discomfort 
• Charting an authentic path for myself

Of course, I make mistakes. Sometimes I feel off the Saturn wagon. However, I don’t usually struggle with Saturnian topics such as structure and limitations. 

So it was a big surprise to discover that I have to handle non-Saturnian issues during my Saturn return. This process started back in 2020 and I share it in this text.

You will read about these:

1. The Discovery of Non-Saturnian Tips During My First Saturn Return  
2. 9 Things I Did To Regulate My Nervous System During My First Saturn Return
   1. 1. Consuming Non-Astrological Content Related to the Saturn Return
   2. 2. Consuming Feel-Good Content Aligned With My Solar Return Chart 
   3. 3. Journaling
   4. 4. Cum*ing
   5. 5. Walking
   6. 6. Resting
   7. 7. Reducing Time Spent on Social Media
   8. 8. Being in The Present
   9. 9. Choosing a Mantra
3. How to Discover What Works for YOUR Nervous System 

The Discovery of Non-Saturnian Tips During My First Saturn Return  

On December 22nd, 2020, with Saturn freshly arrived in Aquarius, I read a tweet that impacted me. 

I don’t recall it exactly right now, but this was the gist of it: 

As someone ruled by Saturn, this planet’s transits are not about improving yourself, but about accepting yourself more. 

I WAS FLOORED. 

I’m ruled by Saturn! Saturn rules everyone whose Ascendant (rising sign) is Capricorn or Aquarius.  

Back in December 2020 (and now too, who am I kidding), I was going through the process of ACCEPTANCE. 

Related: What Is the Saturn Return in Astrology?

I realized this process is linked to another one that greatly surprised me: ENJOYMENT. It’s vital to make space for enjoyment. Life is too tough to add more worries to it. 

To cope with the most brutal moments of the Saturn return I needed practices that could make me feel well. 

These practices must be enjoyable, simple, easy to execute, and repeatable. They also have to be economical. If they’re too Saturnian or complex, they wouldn’t work. It would be like adding more fuel to the fire of pressing commitments and obligations. They have to be and feel lovely. 

Nowadays, I know that these cute practices are regulating my nervous system. 

And nervous system regulation IS EVERYTHING.

If you feel good, not dopamine-driven good, but good in a calm and nourishing way, good things will happen. 

Or at least you’ll be able to deal with whatever presents in your life with more serenity, flexibility, and equanimity. 

Society wants you to be dysregulated. If you’re out of whack, they can sell more stuff to you, or keep you hooked to substances or screens. Some people benefit from you being exhausted to a point where you’re incapable of making healthy decisions.

Implementing practices that regulate your nervous system is crucial for navigating your Saturn return. 

Related: Essential Tips to Prepare for Your Saturn Return

Contrary to popular opinion, feeling good is not selfish. If you feel good, you can positively impact your surroundings and the world at large.

Being worried and anxious all the time doesn’t mean that you care more than relaxed people. It just means that your nervous system is highjacked. You may be brainwashed by Grind And Hustle Culture ™. You lack a clear sense of how to use your energy or where it will be best invested. 

Although it seems too difficult to reprogram yourself, you can do it. And I can help. 

Without further ado, I share what I did during my Saturn return to regulate my nervous system. 

9 Things I Did To Regulate My Nervous System During My First Saturn Return

In the days leading up to my exact return from Saturn, I re-discovered some of these lovely and relaxing practices. 

Engaging in them regularly helped me navigate moments of uncertainty in a much friendlier and safer manner. 

I have to clarify that they are very personal and may not work for you. You can take, leave, or adapt them to your tastes and possibilities.

Here they are: 

1. Consuming Non-Astrological Content Related to the Saturn Return

Watching audiovisual productions about people around 30 going through a crisis helped me feel less alone in my Saturn return.

This content doesn’t have to be astrological because, otherwise, I feel like I’m working.

Two documentaries about pop stars occur during their respective Saturn returns: Taylor Swift: Miss Americana and Gaga: Five Feet Two.

The Danish TV show Home for Christmas also features a protagonist going through her Saturn return. She experiences many doubts about being in a relationship and romantic love.

I mention these three audiovisual productions as non-exhaustive examples.

Look for content you enjoy portraying the adventures and misfortunes of people between the ages of 28 and 32. This is an excellent astrological remedy for your first Saturn return. 

2. Consuming Feel-Good Content Aligned With My Solar Return Chart 

I allow myself to enjoy music, TV shows, movies, or books which make me feel optimistic. I don’t want to be serious all the time. 

During my exact Saturn return, I was watching Glee, which was perfect for my situation then. 

My solar return chart for the year I turned 30 featured the Moon in Leo in the 6th house. 

Glee is a show with a shiny but hardworking vibe, perfect for the Moon in Leo in the 6th house. 

So I started watching it almost 10 years after it premiered, and it was a blast. (I know that the show is hugely problematic. I still enjoyed some parts and cringed hard at others.)

This is my recommendation for you: 

Make your solar return chart for the year corresponding to your exact Saturn return. Then, consume content that allows you to connect with the placements of that chart. This content includes music, TV shows, movies, books, newsletters, you name it.

It’s an excellent method to create a nutritional plan that feeds the specific energy of your personal year.

This recommendation is perennial, but I mention it in the context of the Saturn return because that’s my specialty.

3. Journaling

When I journal, I feel relief, and everything hurts less. I feel cleaner and lighter. 

I don’t aim to write quality texts but to free myself. 

I don’t edit or revise. I just write what happened to me, what I feel, what I did, and what I want.

Another path to journaling is to engage with the prompts crafted by Julia Cameron in her masterpiece The Artist’s Way. I firmly believe that we all must complete the exercises in this book at least once in our lifetime. 

4. Cum*ing

Cum*ing always improves my existence. An orgasm reboots my brain and makes life easier. 

On the days close to my exact Saturn return, I took some time after lunch to give myself pleasure. 

It was a daily little Afternoon Delight, just like the movie. 

When I recommend cum*ing often, people say: “But I’m not in a relationship, or I don’t have a sexual partner.” 

So what? Haven’t you heard about masturbation or sex toys? 

My Satisfyer might be one of the best investments I ever made. Not even kidding, fellas. 

5. Walking

Aristotle’s followers were called Peripatetics. This name may be due to the philosopher’s habit of walking (peripatein in Greek) while communicating ideas.

Another hypothesis suggests that the word comes from the covered walkway (peripatos in Greek) of the Lyceum. This was the place where Aristotle taught.

I’ve always enjoyed walking. But since discovering these facts about movement in ancient philosophy, it has become one of my favorite introspective activities.

When it’s cold, I like to walk before noon to feel the sun on my face. Conversely, when it’s hot, I want to do it at sunset outdoors while listening to music or podcasts.

If I go out alone, I can think, be away from people, and commune with nature.

Sometimes I go out with my mom, friends, or my partner. In those cases, I take the opportunity to chat, maybe stop for a coffee, or look at shop windows.

During the Saturn return (and always), I suggest walking outdoors to cleanse your mind. Moving your body and connecting with nature is one of the best things you can do for your overall health. Start with 30 minutes a day and then add more and more time to this practice. 

If you don’t like walking, try engaging in some exercise you enjoy. You have to engage your body, in the most literal sense of the verb, during your Saturn return. 

6. Resting

Resting is fundamental to breaking the vicious circle of negative thoughts and to being able to relax.

You can rest by sleeping more, taking naps, meditating, and spending time without screens. Simply closing your eyes for five minutes and taking deep breaths is also restful.

Apparently, there are seven different types of rest, each providing release to various parts of our bodies and minds. 

I combined several of these practices during my exact Saturn return. I’m still a defendant in cultivating a slow life and getting away from the rat race. 

In 2020, the singer SZA posted this phrase on her Twitter account: 

Every dead body on Mt Everest was once a very determined individual so…maybe calm down

This phrase contains an extreme assertion that some people might criticize for “glorifying laziness.”

I believe it’s an invitation to slow down, one of the best things you could do during your Saturn return. Slowing down will allow you to process the grief caused by a type of life that’s coming to an end.   

Why do we rush so much? Where do we want to get to faster? To death?

We all need to drink a giant cosmic chamomile tea. And I include myself in this one. 

7. Reducing Time Spent on Social Media

On Instagram, everyone seems happy, successful, beautiful, and well-traveled. Or at least they appear to be.

Not everything that shines is gold, but sometimes it’s hard to accept this truth.

Leading up to my exact Saturn return, I significantly reduced my consumption of Instagram content. As a direct result, my levels of comparisonitis decreased.

Right now, I’m not even on social media and my mental health has improved dramatically. I suggest you reduce the time you spend on social media, do a detox, or abandon those platforms altogether. 

I recommend three documentaries about the harmful effects of social media: 

• The Social Dilemma
• The Antisocial Network: Memes to Mayhem
• Fake Famous 

If you want to go deeper, check Jaron Lanier’s book Ten Arguments for Deleting Your Social Media Accounts Right Now. Dr. Anne Lembke’s Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence is also phenomenal.

8. Being in The Present

This point might seem trivial but could be the most difficult to achieve.

Sometimes, I struggle with feeling like I’m not where I “should be” or that I could be doing something else.

Then I remember that this is an illusion.

But a painful illusion. When I think like this, I bring myself back to the present and calm down by breathing slowly.

A few years ago, I read the book Getting Things Done. I’ve always been interested in improving processes to spend less time on what I consider meaningless.

This book is one of the most famous on maximizing productivity by reducing the stress generated by pending tasks.

One of GTD’s most essential premises is to think about the task you will perform immediately. This allows you to focus on the present. By doing it, you reduce the anxiety that sometimes arises when you embark on a long and extensive project.

Let me give you a simple example.

Let’s say you want to write a book. Your mind tends to wander far into the future. You think about the distant and remote moment when the book will be finished and published.

Your thoughts oscillate between “I’m writing a classic, I’m such a GENIUS!” and “No one will want to read this garbage.”

The restless mind prevents you from focusing on the nearest, most immediate task, which is, precisely, writing the book.

Focus on the next sentence, the next paragraph, and the next chapter. Focus on what you can do NOW.

When you feel like you’re going too far into the future and your mind starts working against you, close your eyes, bring yourself back to the present, and think (or say out loud) the following: 

What is the most immediate task? What can I focus on RIGHT NOW?

Then, execute that task because thinking and not doing keeps you trapped in the spiral of negative thoughts. 

I assure you that focusing on the next, most immediate task is incredibly effective for moving forward with your projects. At the same time, you’ll reduce your stress levels. 

Saturn wants us to go step by step. Slowly. Piano piano si va lontano.  

9. Choosing a Mantra

When you find a phrase that you like and helps you calm down, repeat it to yourself mentally. Do it in moments of stress or whenever you feel down.

I like this one attributed to British writer Vivian Greene: 

Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass. It’s about learning to dance in the rain.

It has helped me navigate the stormiest periods of my existence knowing that, as Franklin D. Roosevelt pointed out, 

A smooth sea never made a skilled sailor.

Louise Hay has a classic that has been with me for several years now: 

All is well. Everything is working out for my highest good. Out of this situation only good will come. I am safe.

Find a mantra that inspires you and reminds you that “bad” moments are part of existence. But they also come to an end at some point.

If you don’t like mantras, you can use a song’s lyrics as an inspirational hymn. I like Love Yourz by J. Cole, Jump by Madonna, and Born This Way by Lady Gaga, just to name a few. They always make me feel good and connected with my inner strength. 

How to Discover What Works for YOUR Nervous System 

These tools have worked for me to regulate my nervous system during my exact Saturn return. However, I know that they may not rock your boat. 

So here are some extra ideas that could be useful for you and your current circumstances and preferences: 

• Gardening 
• Cleaning
• Singing
• Dancing
• Running
• Grooming yourself 
• Playing with pets
• Going to a yoga class
• Taking a hot/cold shower
• Making playlists for different moods
• Having magnesium before bed
• Using calming essential oils in an oil diffuser 
• Engaging in chiropractic or massage sessions weekly
• Drinking natural probiotics such as kombucha and kefir
• Surrounding yourself with people who are regulated
• Decluttering and not hoarding objects that don’t bring you joy 
• Listening to your body’s natural rhythms and giving your body what it needs

This list is diverse and could also be “contradictory,” meaning that some tasks are energizing while others are calming. 

This is intentional. 

Your nervous system can become dysregulated in two main fashions. 

If you are hyper-aroused, you’ll need self-soothing skills that can shift your energy and make you feel more relaxed. For example, you may want to meditate in a situation like this. 

But if you’re hypo-aroused, meaning that you have low energy and you are shut down, you may not want to meditate. In this instance, walking, dancing, or singing could be skills that give you a much-needed energy boost.   

It’s vital to have a list of skills ahead of time so they become second nature to you. This will allow you to regulate yourself more easily and compassionately.

Related: My Philosophy About Astrology

Your personal list must contain various skills or practices requiring different time and resources. Some things on your list must make you more active, while others must help you become calmer. 

Include cognitive and somatic skills. Sometimes, you’ll need to stimulate your mind, while other times, you’ll need to bring your body to the present. 

Your list has to be personal, extensive, specific, sensory-rich, and open to new additions or reductions. It has to vary depending on the particular stages of your journey of self-awareness. 

Have different skills that fit different scenarios. When you become dysregulated, you will need to check the list and immediately find something that could work for you. When you are already dysregulated, you’ll not be in the best state to find new activities that could be helpful. 

I hope this text gives you ideas for starting to self-regulate your nervous system. The practices can be implemented during your Saturn return, but they will ALWAYS be one of your best allies.